


One Thousand Words and I Have None

by TVBS



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: F/F, F/M, Genderfluid Character, Other, accidental transphobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-16
Updated: 2015-05-16
Packaged: 2018-03-30 19:12:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3948379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TVBS/pseuds/TVBS
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gender's not always 100% explainable.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Thousand Words and I Have None

The person in the mirror wasn't quite right. Michael frowned, leaning in slightly. Contacts were in, so it wasn't like he couldn't see, but there was just something... off. Something settled wrong mentally. What was it? What was he missing?

"Hey, get your nakedness covered. We're going to be late..." Lindsay trailed off as Michael didn't move, still frowning at the mirror. "Something wrong?"

"Yeah." One finger poked the reflective glass, right in the nose. "Doesn't really look right, does it?"

Lindsay watched him for a moment, her head tilting. "You want to do something different?"

"I guess so." It was frustrating, not having the words. But... his gaze followed down his body, thinking. What was it?

"You wanna wear some makeup today?"

"I thought you said we're going to be late," Michael said with a smirk, meeting her eyes in the mirror.

She snorted, waving her hand. "Whatever. This is more important right now." Lindsay grabbed a barely used pot of powder and a brush, looking at him. "Besides, if you tried, it'd come out thick and cakey. So, how do you want it? Do you want me to do it like mine, or like Arryn's?"

While sometimes he admired Arryn's makeup skills, Michael did not think he could pull it off. "Natural. I don't want to deal with Geoff's 'got a hot date tonight' jokes."

"You always do," she pointed out as she knocked some powder into the cap, swirling the brush in it. "Now shut up and let me work."

There was something calming about Lindsay putting makeup on him. Each pass of the brush relaxed something in his shoulders, and as she added eyeshadow and mascara to it, he could feel himself smiling. Another brush swept along his cheeks, taking advantage of the grin to add blush. Michael's eyes opened just in time to see Lindsay bend down for a kiss, and shut them again, leaning into it.

"Just a little lip tint and you're done," she whispered into the kiss. "How're you doing?"

"Better," came the admission. But something still wasn't right. Makeup was now on, and something... itched.

Lindsay pulled back, the frown on her face obvious as she found the tin, rubbing her finger across the top of the tint and applying it. "Better isn't good enough."

"I don't want to fucking deal with that all-"

"Yeah, but if you wear your usual, you're going to feel it all day, aren't you?" Goddamn, why was she so smart? "Michael..." Her hands came down on shoulders as she took a deep breath. "Look, I love you, okay? So just tell me what it is."

"I don't know!"

"Do you want to look pretty today?" she pressed on, ignoring the frustration. "Is today a makeup day? Is it a pretty clothes day? Hell, is it a penis day?"

"Yes, yes, and yes." Michael took a deep breath, and tried so hard to remember not to smear the mascara. "But it's not-"

Understanding crossed Lindsay's face. "I get it. Is it a girl day?"

Girl day. But penis day. Fuck, that was confusing. But it explained why "he" settled wrong on her mental tongue. "Linds... it's a girl day."

"Cool." She smiled, grabbing her hand. "Come on, that's why we bought this shit. Your tits are going to look _awesome_ today." Lindsay pulled her along to the closet, to the small corner left mostly forgotten. "We're going to have to keep penis day in mind, so either a dress or loose skirt so we don't see boxers, or loose jeans and a cute top. Which do you want?"

"Uh." She usually didn't think about this kind of thing. Michael just looked at her clothes, blank. "I uh. Guess jeans and a cute top? Fuck, you know I don't think about girl days."

"That's why you have me," she told her cheerfully.

* * *

Late was an understatement. Of course, it had taken forever for Lindsay to find an outfit Michael was happy with. Turned out loose jeans weren't actually something she wanted to wear, and Michael ended up striding in wearing a pair of flats and a long skirt, a lacy blouse completing the outfit. But damn it, she looked cute today. Even if she was pissed off at Austin because really? One accident and I-35 had to be a parking lot? It was even off to the side, so that meant the fuckers were rubbernecking. Fucking Texans.

Jack looked up as the door slammed shut behind her, ready to say something about how late she was before he caught sight of her outfit and makeup, the look on his face softening. "Hey sweetie," he said, cautiously. "Having one of those days?"

"35's a fucking parking lot," she bit out, her usual masculine voice making him frown. Gavin looked over at them, eyes widening when he caught glimpse of her. Yeah, well, she wasn't feeling like speaking from her throat today. "And then yeah, having one of those girl days."

"Not getting you out of recording," Geoff told her, not bothering to turn around. "You have shit to do today, and unless you want to come out, you're going to have to be a guy for a few hours."

Michael made a face as she dropped into her seat. While it'd be nice to come out, it'd be one of those things where the trans community would either love or hate her, and the transphobic comments would never stop. Not to mention she was pretty certain no one would really get it. Hell, she didn't really get it and she was the one living in her body. "Fine," she groaned, kicking one foot across the floor. She looked over at Gavin, and frowned. "Hey, Gav, would it kill you to say good morning?"

He jumped, looking over at her briefly. "I... good morning, Michael?" The lilt at the end made it a question, making her frown harder as he went back to his work.

"Dude, why are you always such a freak about this?" Michael reached out with her foot, kicking his chair.

"What?!" The squawk came fast as Gavin rolled slightly, flailing. "I'm not acting like a freak."

"Uh, so what do you call this, then?" She gestured at him, snorting when he rubbed the back of his neck and shrugged. "You asshole. Every fucking time, I swear."

Gavin shook his head. "No! I'm just busy, s'all." He hesitated, then started rolling himself back over to his desk. "You do look nice today," he added.

"Now you say something," she grumbled as she turned to her own desk.

* * *

Coming out had been hard.

He had to come out first to Lindsay. She had to know sometimes he was a she, or a they, or whatever. It wouldn't be fair if they kept dating and she didn't know. _That_ had been the easy part of coming out to Lindsay.

The hard part had come the first time they had sex.

* * *

Sometimes when it was a girl day, she _really_ had to be girly. Which included hardcore cuddle sessions with her wife.

But _god **damn**_ Gavin had been annoying today. And not his usual annoying. Well, usual when she was a guy. This was a special kind of annoying, the kind that came about when he kept acting like she was an alien species and didn't know what to do with her. It pissed her off. Why the fuck did he have to keep doing that? He never really acted like he had a _problem_ with it, but he always fucking acted weird when Michael was a girl.

"Even fucking _Ray_ stopped being so weird about it before Gavin," she moaned into Lindsay's chest. "What the fuck is up with him?"

"Maybe he's seen the radiance of your beauty as a girl and has fallen for you."

She snorted. "Ha, ha."

Lindsay shrugged, shifting under her slightly. "Hey, you never know. Of course, you could always be a fucking adult and ask him instead of doing this whining bullshit."

Michael shifting so he could look up at her, blinking. "But us girls have to communicate to the men in our lives with hints and interpretive dance."

"You haven't legally been a girl in years."

She tried to look indignant at that, but all Michael could manage was a second before busting out into laughter. "Okay, fine, you got me there. It's just- fuck, every time I even say something, he's all 'but I'm not being weird, I'm not being a mingy git, blah blah blah.' He keeps dodging the fucking subject and I'm tired of it. And it's not like he's outright... hating it, but he's just weird about it. I wish I knew what the hell he was thinking."

"Talk to him," Lindsay told her firmly. Michael looked at her, raising an eyebrow, and she did the same. "What, did you think I was going to baby you tonight? Who the fuck did you think you married?"

"I hate you sometimes."

* * *

It had been hard coming out to Lindsay. She could have freaked at any moment.

But she never did.

She accepted him.

Then came explaining it to the guys.

* * *

"I still can't believe you're actually a girl under all that," Geoff mused, idly clicking on something as Michael bristled. It wasn't a girl day, but they weren't a girl. Not right now, anyway. "You really legally are a guy, though?"

"Yes," they gritted out, trying not to snap at him. They had that argument before, and he still didn't understand shit. Hell, _Ryan_ , in all his "I know a creepy amount about a lot of things"-ness, still didn't exactly get it. He came the closest, though, getting at least that Michael had felt being a guy most often, so legally it said "male." But it didn't matter that they had girl days and decided to wear makeup or dresses. They weren't "actually a girl."

"Huh." Geoff stretched, looking over at them. "You're being a guy today?"

Fuck it, easy way out. "Yeah." Easier than explaining it was a day neither fit. That they didn't feel really like a guy, or a girl, or like anything really. And time to find a shiny change of topic, because fuck this line of conversation. They were not dealing with more of this. "Hey, when is Gavin getting back from England?"

"Probably another two weeks. He has a few things to wrap up first." Geoff looked down at his clock, and groaned. "And it's about time for everyone's favorite 'watch Geoff get the shit scared out of him.'"

"Oh, are we recording another horror game?" Playing one with Gavin was always fun, but it was a special treat to watch Geoff shit his pants at a scary game.

"Yup. Let's get this thing rolling."

* * *

And then came Gavin.

* * *

"Michael, my boi!" Gavin grinned at him, tilting his head back slightly as Michael came up beside him. "I was just thinking about you."

He raised an eyebrow at that. "Really? Because it looks like you were fucking around."

"While thinking about you." Gavin spun around, pulling his feet up into his chair and hooking his hands around the ankles. "So what's up?"

Yeah, now Gavin was friendly. Male presenting, and it helped that Michael actually was a guy right now. It pissed him off. "You. We need to talk right the fuck now."

"We're talking right now." Oh that little shit wasn't pulling that card. "What's wrong?"

"Ass out of chair." He was not dealing with this right now. And Gavin was not moving. Fine. Michael grabbed him by the collar and hauled him up, pulling him out of the room. "I'll be back with the Brit in a bit," he called out, Geoff waving without looking as everyone in the room ignored Gavin's squawks of protest. He dragged Gavin down the hall, finding a quiet place to shove him into. "Okay, asshole, you want to explain a few things?"

Now that he was released, Gavin fussed with his collar and tried to straighten his shirt. "What's this all about?" he whined. " _Mi_ chael."

"Micool," he mimicked mockingly. "Fuck, you know what this is about, you idiot. Before you fucked off to England, you acted like a shithead about my girl day." Gavin looked away at that, only pissing off Michael more. "Look the fuck at me! You keep treating me weird for that and if you're going to have problems, you better tell me the fuck now. Do you really have that much of a problem with it?"

"That's not it!"

"Then what the fuck is it, Gav? Because you're really not helping your case."

"Because you're my boi!" Gavin looked at him suddenly, eyes wide. "You're my boi. But when you're not a boy, what am I'm supposed to call you? I don't want to use the wrong word, to... call you a boy when you're a girl, or when you're... just not. So what am I supposed to call you? I don't know what I'm supposed to say!"

Michael just looked at him. Then punched him, once, in the shoulder. Hard. "Fucking moron."

"Michael." Gavin rubbed his shoulder as he whined, pouting. "Did I say something wrong?"

"How about that you could always ask me? You could ask me if it's okay to call me your boi instead of assuming I wouldn't be okay with it, which, newsflash, I'm okay with it because it's a nickname between us. Like X-Ray and Vav for you and Ray. And you think you have to treat me different when I'm not having guy days- seriously? Have you noticed Geoff doesn't? Ryan really doesn't either. Treat me like you usually do, doofus." Michael grabbed his other shoulder, looking him in the eyes. "And hey. Don't make me think you have a problem with me unless you really do. And if that's the case, let me know what it is so I can kick the shit out of you."

That made Gavin grin. "Only if you can catch me."

"You're not as fast as you think you are, Gav." But the words made something loosen in his shoulders and grin back. "Come on. Let's get back to work."


End file.
